A few years ago, when this happened the first time, it filled me with dismay. “God, was I getting old! Who is that woman in the mirror?” It was frightening to realize that the years “over 30″ had accumulated so fast. And, over 30 was now shockingly “over 50″. Damn!
Now, I sit here quite comfortably confronting my 55-year-old face and can rather peacefully study the changes that have occurred. I find them more interesting than dismaying. How time and experience have changed what I look like no longer bothers me – most of the time. That’s because I nurture this lady inside me. I take the time and effort to invite the real Robin to show up in my life. Now this person — me, Robin — nestles very comfortably within me. I like this lady quite a lot. And, I love her dearly. She is my best friend, partner, playmate and confidant. And she makes me laugh like hell.
So how did this “coming home to Robin” come about? While it was more than shocking to realize that quite a bit more than half my life on this earth is well and truly over, some important facts have come home to me: The truth is the truth. I am no longer 40-something; I am 50-something.
The time for expecting miracles in my life is over. There is no magic fairy dust. There is work to be done and truths to be accepted. A sense of humor is the biggest gift I can give myself — and you! I learned to laugh at myself well and often. Self-pity is a deathtrap. It saps one of all energy and leads to anger and resentment. Being a victim of my own life is no longer an option.
I am responsible for where I am, who I am and how things are working out.
I am powerful! If my life is not so great, who has created the mess? Me! So what can I not create if I make some thoughtful, conscious choices and proceeded to act upon them?
This is an inside job. My personal happiness and fulfillment are my responsibility. All of the choices are mine to make. Live is lived in the present, in the now. Each breath is a gift and I cherish it. I try to be open to the ever present opportunities and gifts of each moment.
My life is one of creation; not discovery. I am the moving force behind what happens. The difference lies in the discipline. Let me quote Albert Einstein here: “Nothing happens until something moves!” I must follow up my choices with action. I cannot remain stationary in life.
I am not alone. Everyone else is on the same ride! There is always something new to discover and share with the world and people around me. When I consciously choose to live this way, Robin is at home with Robin. Each day arrives as a joy and an adventure and there is laughter in my heart.
By Robin Korth
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